It Just Struck Me
It didn't really affect me when I first found out which class I was going to.
It didn't really affect me much when I found out the people who were in my class.
But it just struck me when I read a tag my friend left me.
She said, "aww.. you going 3-4? nevermind, you can still make friends with people from other classes."
Then I replied, "will you forget me? will all of you forget me now that I'm not as "clever" as you guys?"
And it hit me.
If I go to this class the number of people who I know is very little and all my friends who I'm close to are going to the Science Stream.
What if they forget me since they have "smart" friends with them?
What if they forget me because I'm now an "art student"?
What if they start ignoring me because they think that they shouldn't mingle with "art people"?
There's so many "what ifs" and I don't like it.
I just sobbed this afternoon knowing that I would be leaving behind everything I know for something that the Lord has called me to do.
I know it's kinda bad of me to blame God, but I'm not. It's just that..
|sigh|
The people I used to hang out with would not be with me as much as they used to.
They would only be around during recess and CCA.
Chae Gyeong, Hee Soong and Soong Young.. Kang Hyun is going to leave you guys to go to Art Class.
___________________________________________________
I'm leaving everything I know behind. Leaving it for something new. I don't do well in new things. New teachers, new friends, new life. Everything that I thought I knew are now just a wisp of smoke. Just a blurred memory. A past-time that I used to enjoy.
My life now is going through a new road, a different path from everybody else. Even from those who are my "family". They too are taking something totally different. I'm stuck in a cross-road, but the other side is closed. I can see everyone on the other side, but there's just no way for me to get there. There's only one path for me now and that's to follow the "yellow-bricked road" that won't lead me to the Wizard Of Oz.
The yellow-bricked road that would lead me further and further away from everything I knew.
I'll miss everyone who's on the other side of the blocked road. I would miss the memories we had. Every single moment we shared, the laughter and the pain. The losses and the victories.
I just want to be with you guys again. But that is something that I can't have.
Now..
I would just have to follow where the "yellow-bricked road" leads me.
I just hope I can trust it.
It didn't really affect me much when I found out the people who were in my class.
But it just struck me when I read a tag my friend left me.
She said, "aww.. you going 3-4? nevermind, you can still make friends with people from other classes."
Then I replied, "will you forget me? will all of you forget me now that I'm not as "clever" as you guys?"
And it hit me.
If I go to this class the number of people who I know is very little and all my friends who I'm close to are going to the Science Stream.
What if they forget me since they have "smart" friends with them?
What if they forget me because I'm now an "art student"?
What if they start ignoring me because they think that they shouldn't mingle with "art people"?
There's so many "what ifs" and I don't like it.
I just sobbed this afternoon knowing that I would be leaving behind everything I know for something that the Lord has called me to do.
I know it's kinda bad of me to blame God, but I'm not. It's just that..
|sigh|
The people I used to hang out with would not be with me as much as they used to.
They would only be around during recess and CCA.
Chae Gyeong, Hee Soong and Soong Young.. Kang Hyun is going to leave you guys to go to Art Class.
___________________________________________________
I'm leaving everything I know behind. Leaving it for something new. I don't do well in new things. New teachers, new friends, new life. Everything that I thought I knew are now just a wisp of smoke. Just a blurred memory. A past-time that I used to enjoy.
My life now is going through a new road, a different path from everybody else. Even from those who are my "family". They too are taking something totally different. I'm stuck in a cross-road, but the other side is closed. I can see everyone on the other side, but there's just no way for me to get there. There's only one path for me now and that's to follow the "yellow-bricked road" that won't lead me to the Wizard Of Oz.
The yellow-bricked road that would lead me further and further away from everything I knew.
I'll miss everyone who's on the other side of the blocked road. I would miss the memories we had. Every single moment we shared, the laughter and the pain. The losses and the victories.
I just want to be with you guys again. But that is something that I can't have.
Now..
I would just have to follow where the "yellow-bricked road" leads me.
I just hope I can trust it.
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